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Episode 5
talk about. You can take some drinks from the
fridge.” “I am okay; I don‟t want to drink
anything. I am just worried, that‟s all,” she
said. There was silence in the room for
sometime; Brenda was not comfortable with
that. “Adam, I said that I am really worried.
Why don‟t you tell me what you think is so
urgent that you requested I should see you
instead of keeping me in suspense?” Adam
sighed and continued to focus his attention
on the television. „God!‟ she thought, „he is so
handsome. Please, let it not be . . . ‟ “Brenda,”
he gently called her. She loved it when he
called her that way. “I have been going
through a series of personal problems for the
past few weeks.
It has affected me at my workplace and even
my relationship with people. I . . . I don‟t
know how to say this . . . I am going through
a phase in my life and I have been thinking
about us.” „This is it,‟ she thought, „he said
„about us.‟‟ She remained silent, though, her
heart beating loudly. She allowed him to
continue. “I found out that hanging out with
you will only make you a victim and that is
not what you deserve,” he said. “A victim of
what?” she gently probed. “You won‟t
understand, Brenda, but I want to go through
this alone. I want us to stop seeing each other
. . . let‟s watch and see . . . maybe things will
get better and we will start all over again, but
for now, I don‟t want to be involved with
anyone.
I want to be left alone. I just hope you will
understand,” he concluded. Her whole body
began to shiver. “Adam, I am not worried
about being a victim or being involved with
your problem. All you have to do is share it
with me so that I can be part of it. Together
we will come up with a solution. But please
don‟t push me out of your life,” she pleaded.
“I am sorry, Brenda, I have already taken my
decision, there is no point deceiving you,” he
maintained. “Perhaps I have done something
wrong, just tell me. I will make amends,
whatever you want.” “This is not about you; I
really want you to believe me when I say it is
for your own good. Well, I really don‟t expect
you to understand. You know what? I have to
go to my room. I want to be left alone and I
don‟t want to talk about this anymore.”
Brenda thought she was going to die or at
least faint. She couldn‟t understand. Isn‟t this
her loving Adam? All the happiness she had
ever known was suddenly coming to an end.
The look on his face told her that this was
really over for sure. She had seen that look
before, and this wasn‟t the first time a man
was giving her that look. Begging him would
actually make no difference. She felt weak.
She felt foolish and worthless. Yes, maybe she
was actually worthless; that was why men
always used her and dumped her like a piece
of rag. Maybe she was just a piece of shit.
She managed to stand up and leave his
apartment with her last strength. She didn‟t
know what else to do; maybe she was in some
kind of dream. As she walked along the street
and thought about what just happened, she
suddenly felt dizzy. She knew she was going
to faint since everything was becoming
blurred, but she kept on walking; she must not
faint. Not on Stream Street. God, perhaps it
was better to die right away.
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